extramarital affairs

Once in a while just a little taste of a new woman, a new man revives your interest in the old woman and the old man. You start thinking, “After all, she is not so bad.” A little change is always good.
 I am not against extramarital relationships. The people who are against them are really teaching you possessiveness in an indirect way. When I say I am not against extramarital relationships I am teaching you nonpossessiveness. Just see the point: if I talk about nonpossessiveness people think, “That’s spiritual, that’s religious – that’s great!” But if I talk about extramarital relationships, the spiritual and the religious are immediately offended.
 But I am saying the same thing. Talking about nonpossessiveness is abstract, talking about extra-marital relationship is concrete. And you cannot live with abstractions, you have to live with concrete life. And what wrong can it do? If a man is tired of the same woman – the same contours, the same geography, the same topography – once in a while a little bit different geography, a little bit different landscape... and he comes home again interested in exploring the old map. It gives a break – a coffee break. And after each coffee break you can again get involved in the same work, the same files, and you open them and you start working.... The coffee break helps you.
 If people want to live together in a deep intimacy, they should not be possessive. They should allow freedom. And that’s what extra-marital relationship is – freedom.
 Extramarital relationships are very significant, immensely helpful to psychological growth and maturity, because when you start moving with another woman or man for a day or two, or a few days, a distance is created between you and your old lover. And that distance is very helpful. When you are exactly at the same distance as you were before you fell in love with each other, again a honeymoon is possible. That space will allow a new honeymoon. Again you will become interested, again you will start reconsidering, rethinking the whole matter.
 And being with the new man and the new woman you will see that after all they are not so different. So what is the point of destroying a certain intimacy that has developed? What is the point of destroying it? And intimacy is far more fulfilling than any sexual relationship can ever be.
 If two persons are really intimate they will allow absolute freedom, because they know that intimacy is far more beautiful, far more significant – they have  experienced it. So any sexual relationship is just a little diversion, nothing can go wrong just because of it.

Thanks for reading 
kumarsumanabhishek4@gmail.com 

Comments

  1. PsychologyeyeJanuary 29, 2020 at 7:59 AM

    I read your blog...I found that it is your persective....I respect it but extra martial or cheating is two of the samething...Sex is something which is related to your emotions and Also we never get bored of relationships. Did you ever get bored of your parents??? No ?? right?? then how could you get bored with Your partner her shape or geography...

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    1. Abhishek Kuman SumanJanuary 29, 2020 at 8:15 AM

      Emotions, desires, ambitions, are in your head; they will dry up.your emotions, your sentiments, your thoughts - the whole paraphernalia of the mind - is from the outside, is manipulated by the outside.
      Sex should be more fun than such a serious affair as it has been made in the past. It should be like a game, a play: two persons playing with each other’s bodily energies. If they both are happy, it should be nobody else’s concern.Contraceptives have transformed the very quality of sex: sex becomes fun. Sex is no more such a serious thing as it used to be. It becomes just a playfulness—two bodies playing with each other, that‘s all. There is nothing wrong in it. You play football—what is wrong in that? You play volleyball—what is wrong in that? Two body energies are involved.
       Sex is also a game, but it was not a game before. Before contraceptives it was a serious thing. Contraceptives have eradicated that whole seriousness about it. Now the religions are bound to be afraid, because their whole edifice can collapse because of contraceptives. What the atheists could not do in centuries, contraceptives can do within decades. They have already done it: contraceptives have made man free of the priest. 😊😊😊

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